Rhett was in the worst mood this morning. At church, he threw one wicked tantrum after another, and as I wrestled him out to the car in the middle of the meeting I found myself asking, “Heavenly Father, if you want me to go to church, why do you make it so hard!?”
I strapped Rhett into his car seat. I wanted to take him home, but worried about leaving Kender. I could have found a way to leave, but I decided to stay in hopes that I would be blessed for my obedience. I drove Rhett around the block a couple times and then took him back inside.
Sunday school was about how God gives us trials to refine us for his future purposes. We talked about how God may send us in one direction, only to send us in a completely different one soon after. He does it because he has a greater plan for us, and we need the experiences he gives us.
It was exactly the lesson I needed. It reminded me of when Ryan and I were back in college in our pre-kid days. He felt strongly that we should move back home to Washington and join the Air Force, so we prayed about it and packed up our little apartment and moved back home. Soon after we arrived, Ryan felt strongly that he should wait to join the Air Force. He didn’t understand why, and was confused by the seemingly conflicting promptings, but he obeyed.
There were many times after that that we almost joined the military. Looking back, I think Heavenly Father was using that time to prepare us both for Ryan’s current job – Deputy Sheriff – which he never would have gotten if we hadn’t moved back home. He LOVES his job, and that in itself is a huge blessing. We didn’t understand it then, and many times felt hopeless and confused, but God had a plan for us all along.
I don’t understand now what good will come from enduring Rhett’s church tantrums, but I know the Lord has a plan. Maybe Kender sees me struggling, and how I choose to stay even though it’s hard. Maybe someday this experience will help him realize how much the gospel of Christ means to me, and helps strengthen his testimony. One can only hope!
Anyway, the takeaway from all of this was:
Keep enduring. Keep moving on. It will all be worth it.